- I do not want to milk anything. Ever. (Myself excluded, of course.)
- I do not want to make or wear rope sandals.
- I have a 401(k).
- I do not want someone else, of either gender, sleeping with my husband.
- I do not want to fertilize a garden with my own waste.
- My hair is not the right texture for dreadlocks.
- I want my children to learn more than hammock-weaving and animal husbandry.
- I do not like Kool-Aid.
- I am a terrible drummer.
- I do not want anyone besides myself to breastfeed my children.
- I do not look good in curtain.
- Jesus does not want me for a sunbeam. Trust me on this.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Yesterday, Sam took the boys to the library for a celebration of Dr. Seuss's birthday. And then today he suggested we join a commune. I think he got the idea off the side of a jar of organic peanut butter. While I will eat the nut butter products of the sun children, I will not live amongst them. Below is a list of random reasons I would make a terrible hippie.